What Have You Done for Me Lately?

Ever feel like you just can't do enough? After washing the dishes, mopping the floor, playing with Legos, dancing to children's music, eating peanut butter and jelly for the fifth day in a row and watching reruns of Wizards of Waverly Place all day, you kind of feel like, "Why doesn't anyone do anything for me?"

I need some of these kids' powers.

Sometimes I feel like that. And then I wonder if it's okay for me to feel like that. And then I get over it.

I used to work full-time. Then I lost my job due to layoffs. It was pretty stressful for awhile, but then I got a new job; one that essentially leaves me at home most of the month and only sends me off for a few days before getting to come home again. I don't work full-time anymore. At least, not in an office. Now I call a four bedroom, three bath, 2500 square foot home my office. I definitely work full-time. But I'm not complaining.

Okay, maybe a little.

Mom...I think I have too many Legos.

You see, I have a husband, and four children. And while they are really awesome people, who love me and make me laugh very often...sometimes...I wonder. I wonder why I care about doing the dishes for the millionth time. I wonder why the bathrooms need to be clean. I wonder why my two-year-old won't keep the heads on all of the Lego dudes, and why I have to constantly search for the ones he has lost. I wonder why I feel like I have so much time when I wake up in the morning, and then wonder where it went when I'm crawling into bed once again.

Yes, sometimes I lament staying home, but usually not for very long. Because, I know what it's like to wake up every morning, and to leave your children with someone who is not you, to essentially raise them for that day. I know what it's like to come home from work and just want to take a nap, but you can't because someone needs help with their homework and those tacos aren't sure going to make themselves for dinner.

I've been on both sides of the lawn, and I am here to tell you that both sides of the lawn can be incredibly rewarding, healthy, and green!

Was working full-time and being a mother stressful? Hell yes! Is staying at home sometimes inconceivably stressful and sometimes stifling? Sure! But you know what? Once I decided to have children, I had to shift priorities. Anyone who tells you you can have it all and do it all well is, pardon my French, ridiculous.

Or, maybe it's just me.

Maybe I couldn't have it all. Maybe I didn't want it all. Maybe "ALL" isn't everything it's so darn cracked up to be. I know what I did do, and that's do the best I could. I worked, I mothered, I cooked, I cleaned, I loved my husband and my children and I continue to do so day after day. And after awhile there are a few fundamental truths I have learned:





1. You are the best mother your children are ever going to have. Be there for them, when they want to play with Legos, or when they want to tell you about the mean boy that teases them at recess. Some day, they may not want to tell you anything.

2. Being everything to everyone all the time is not possible. When I worked full-time, I was into my job and it was sometimes hard to leave work at work. Learn how to separate the two and save yourself and your family some stress.




3. Creating memorable experiences doesn't have to cost a lot of money. Spending time with your children is as easy as sitting down and reading a book together. Simple, every day interactions are what they are going to remember and cherish most. Make those times something worth remembering.


4. Make sure you're teaching your children how to work. Sometimes, and I know I am guilty of this, it's just easier to do things yourself. Saving time is great, but wouldn't you rather know that you equipped your children with the tools necessary to succeed in life, rather than sending them out the door with nothing to offer the world other than their good looks?


5. Being good to yourself is essential. Take a walk. Ride a bike. Go for a swim. Take a class. I'm not getting any younger and while aging is inevitable, growing old is a state of mind.




Whatever your goals in life. Whatever your personal situation, when you have children, somehow, someway, your thinking must change. Life isn't just about you anymore. Those kids depend on you. They look up to you. They look to you for guidance, support, and protection. Be their rock. Be the person they want to tell things to.

Instead of wondering what you could be doing, be engaged in what you are doing. Right here. Right now.